Quintessential Kenyon: Student Life, Uncut

The Final Countdown Bucket List

Madeleine Thompson
April 14, 2015

There are 32 days left between me and graduation. Things are finally getting warm after a long, Gambier winter, and suddenly I am struck by the urge to chain myself to one of the pillars of Rosse Hall and refuse to leave. At other moments in the past year I’ll admit I’ve wanted to run away and never return, but now there are flowers blooming and being outside is pleasant instead of painful. The End is approaching all too fast. Given this unfortunate reality, I’ve decided to toss my schoolwork out the nearest window and do exclusively whatever I want for these last 32 days. In order to maximize efficiency at doing exclusively whatever I want, I have compiled a bucket list that you, too, may one day be free to take advantage of. Additional suggestions are welcome!

  • Skinny-dip in the Kokosing. Most of the time you have to actively seek out a calm, fairly secluded river for this activity, but the Kokosing is just a hill away and has plenty of secretive bushes in which to hide.
  • Climb a roof. Any roof. I can’t say exactly why this is such an appealing idea, but the windows in my NCA only open about four inches and that kind of feels like a challenge.
  • Pull a great prank. For April Fools’ Day this year two of my friends put pictures of themselves all over my NCA, but not enough pictures for me or my housemates to notice ... so they had to tell us they did it. But it did inspire me to want to think up a Parent Trap-level prank to play on someone, which I’m still in the process of inventing.
  • Spend a night in the library. It closes at 2 a.m., and I plan to hide behind a sofa or something until everyone is gone. This is a pipe dream and definitely not Campus Safety-approved but admit it, it would be awesome. Didn’t you see that episode of Arthur where they get stuck in the library and find a leftover pizza?
  • Lie in the grass for an entire day. As I mentioned before, things are looking bright and beautiful around campus lately. We’re having the kind of weather that Admissions advertises on the brochures, and I’m not about to miss it.
  • Barbeque something. Several of my neighbors in the NCAs have grills; maybe I’ll borrow one and try my hand at smoking meat or whatever barbecuing actually is. I should probably find out what barbecuing is. I’d also like to mix actual cocktails like an adult.
  • Take a lot of pictures. The last time I did the whole have-a-party-and-upload-100-photos-to-Facebook was in the 10th grade, but now seems like a good time to bring back the “narcissism” my generation is famous for. I don’t want to forget a single second of my last 32 days on the Hill.

Documenting every last card game with my roommates.